


shattered mirrors and bloodied hands

by nonbinarywithaknife (littleboxes)



Series: me sobbing about critical role [30]
Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Pre-Stream (Critical Role), Sad, Self-Hatred, brief description of self harm, really its more sad than angsty
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-01
Updated: 2019-03-01
Packaged: 2019-11-07 17:09:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 534
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17964641
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/littleboxes/pseuds/nonbinarywithaknife
Summary: nott punches a mirrorcaleb offers what comfort he can





	shattered mirrors and bloodied hands

**Author's Note:**

> this takes place after nott & caleb have bonded as friends, but before they meet the nein

Nott is gripping the sides of the rackshamble sink tightly, her claws scratching marks into the metal. The mirror that hangs above it is small and grimy, but unfortunately functional. She stares at her bulging yellow eyes, the slitted red pupils widened in the windowless bathroom. At the tips of her fangs poking out from her mouth at intermittent angles. Her rough, pockmarked green skin, so much rougher than it used to be ( _ should _ be). She lets out a muffled keen, and hurls a first into the glass. The shrieking of the glass shards as they fall grate on her overly-sensitive ears, and they flatten against her skull. Her fist is quickly starting to spurt blood, but she can’t bring herself to care.  

Nott sinks to the ground, wiry arms wrapped around her legs. Tears roll down her cheeks, but her sobs are near soundless. She’s not sure how long it is, only that the tears have stopped and now she just shivers, emotions she’s been repressing for months making themselves known whether she likes it or not, before she hears a knock on the door, accompanied by a Zemnian accent she’s become rather familiar with. “Nott? Is everything… alright?” 

She doesn’t respond, and the door is pushed tentatively open. Caleb pokes his head in, and his brow furrows once he spots her, huddled beneath the sink. 

“Ehrm- Nott? What is- is something wrong?”

He steps forward, into the bathroom, and crouches down, setting a hand on her shoulder. “Nott?”

She moves suddenly, violently, ripping a claw down her left arm and leaving shallow cuts in its wake- “I  _ hate _ this!” she screams, before the angry tears start up again, and she buries her face in Caleb’s shoulder. 

Caleb blinks quickly at the sudden contact, before snapping his fingers and summoning Frumpkin. The cat curls around Nott, purring softly, while Caleb awkwardly pats her shoulder. He doesn’t know what to say, and so says nothing, choosing instead to stay with her until the sounds of crying subside, and she detaches herself from him. 

“I- I’m sorry, Caleb, about that, I’m just gonna-” and then she’s gone, and he can hear the faintest sound of feet on stairs, and he’s left sitting on the bathroom floor, exchanging slightly worried and bewildered glances with Frumpkin. 

Nott doesn’t return to the dingy inn they’re staying in until late in the afternoon. She sets herself at the bar, and orders several glasses of whiskey. She continues this until the bartender- a young-ish human- starts to look vaguely impressed that she’s not on the floor or with a doctor, given her size. Eventually she heads back up to their room, and Caleb notices, as she enters, that she’s managed to acquire even more bandages, and has them wrapped tightly around her arms, neck, and face. He doesn’t say anything about them- at least, not until the two of them are curled up in bed, a thin blanket spread over them. “If you, ah, ever need fresh bandages, I- have more rolls. In my bag.”

For a second, she’s as silent and still as she was before he spoke, and he thinks she won’t answer. But then-

“Thank you, Caleb.”

 

**Author's Note:**

> -im very happy that frumpkin is a character tag, he deserves no less  
> -comments? yes? yes.


End file.
